chimichanga

chimichanga, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i went to la tienda and ate until my plate looked like this.

clown1

clown1, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i went to the harn and i saw this.

sound of silence

sound of silence, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i woke up this morning to see this.

?

IMG_0152, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

this was the last band. see that man with fancy shoes? he has an amazing voice. i was inclined to add him to the list of people who sing well enough for me to consider their voice an actual instrument. the list includes one other person, so you can imagine how much i enjoyed listening to him. and then i told him and he has a nice smile in a weird way.

shush

twat?!?!?!, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

while we were catching up this girl yelled at me. her sister was playing in the second band which sounded like mumbles of jumbles. i am sure they are good when you can understand them, but when i go to satchel's and run into so many people i want to chat a little bit. if they dont want people to talk, they should tie hankerchiefs around their mouths and make everyone sit in a desk facing forward. im sorry. i just felt like i could enjoy myself however i pleased. it's better that i had fun instead of thinking about how i was being scolded for not doing what someone else wants. she came and apologized and i told her i was just visiting and i couldnt understand the lyrics. i think it made her mad again but i cant tell a lie.

meghan lacy is beautiful

IMG_0147, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

then, much to my surprise, meghan lacy walked by me and i grabbed her around the waist! i havent seen meg in YEARS and we used to work at moo's together. we caught up a little bit and decided we were bad girls in high school. together. i was so happy to see her.

texting

texting, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i dont know why but i love texting on my phone. if you have been around me you know part of the reason is it makes glorious sounds when you push any button. but i couldnt hear them at this point so it doesnt work as an excuse this time. i thought i was being rude, but it doesnt really concern me too much. sometimes i need to say things, and so i do. it's the point of having mobile communication available. either way, i could probably be forgiven because i look kinda cute here.

county road

county road, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

after price went home i went to satchel's because there was a show and satchel's has the best pizza in.the.world. this was the opening band and when i walked in they were playing rock me mama and it made me think of lauren caulfield. i thought these were the real people but it turns out they are a cover band, or at least the bartender and i think so. either way, they are kind of my new secret favorite band.

scraping

IMG_0122, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

but we burned a vast majority of them because we got caught up in watching another movie featuring the schwartzmeister. we scraped off the bottoms kind of carefully so that we could try and share them with more people than just JJ. he loves whatever we make no matter what. i think we should try something more savory because we are not really good at baking, at least at my house.

entree vous

entree vous, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i just love this picture. it shows the anticipation all of us had for the cookies, even tilly. these cookies had been building up our expectation for 2 days.

if you disect my heart, you will find mango

IMG_0111, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

yesterday price came over to finish making our cookies. he had to leave early the night before and the dough has to "cheell" so we postponed the baking part. price made some shapes and i ate a sandwich. see that heart one? i requested it.

malebetasplendor

malebetasplendor, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

in between the dark and lights loads i went to petco with tilly. i was supposed to buy her a chew and some diapers because she is going to start menstruating any moment. i saw the fish and remembered i am home from christmas now and i could go ahead and buy my fish to decorate with. this is him; male beta splendor is his name. it sounds wonderful when you say it aloud. tilly picked out a chew and carried it around the store and i forgot the diapers.

ilookfunny

ilookfunny, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

so after washing his pants i decided i needed to add a more traditional self-portrait to the blog. my stomach is really hurty today and bloated. last night was horrendous. i was approached by a pimp and the surrounding strangers not only didnt believe me when i was asking for some help, but proceded to call me derrogatory names while the pimp followed me to my car. true story.

priceypantsypoo

priceypantsypoo, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

price brought his laundry over and i did it. i had to wash his fancy jeans by hand. i thought they looked eery floating in the water. they bleed, and it was like i stumbled in on a suicide. if there had been a candle lit it probably would have been too much for me. i think i thought along these lines because in the book i am reading right now, a girl tries to commit suicide 2 times, the first being the more romantic version and the second straight to the point and successful. her brother is unaware and then tries to commit suicide in the same manor. their parents are desensitized by the time he tries.

pakistaniwhat

pakistaniwhat, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

this post is late. nothing happened to me until i went out last night by myself. i met this guy, greg, who is doing his phd research in central and south america. the topic was really "fluffy" he proclaimed and so i didnt make any effort to remember it. he told me a secularist pakistani female political figure died and it was all over the news. msnbc had nothing to say about it all night. then i sent him home and went dancing. i should have gone home also, but didnt. now i have an additional enemy in gainesville, and it sure as hell isn't taho or emma.

amberandmaryarescaredoflosingeachother

amberandmaryarescaredoflosingeachother, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i am leaving melbourne after spending christmas with my family. amber is officially not a non-smoker. we are screaming at the thought of spending three weeks apart. and at our own personal endeavors taxing on our hearts and minds. today has been a crazy day. i thought i was sick from eating checkers but it was really just a withdrawal.

Christmas

Christmas, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

christmas was sort of familiar this year, but distinctly representative of my 2007. i took some of my sleeping medication last night and slept in until 3. everyone had obviously opened their presents without me, which i didnt take personally at all. i opened my presents with my mom. she bought me the camera i wanted, as demonstrated here. then i cleaned the house with her and helped cook a little bit. i took a shower and then waited for the turkey to finish and amber to come home. when we sat down at the dinner table eddie became even more obnoxious than he had been and started to make comments that were entirely too provacative for me to possibly ignore. then, completely unplanned everyone starts discussing how bipolar doesn't exist and is entirely over-medicated, similar to the critics of a.d.d. have sounded for years. i couldnt hold it in anymore and told them all i was bipolar, at which point they told me number one that they dont believe me because they have never seen me act bipolar, and number two that i am nothing like the people they assumed to be bipolar are. i had to leave the table. thank goodness for amber.

Grandma is Missed

Grandma is Missed, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

it is christmas eve and i cant help but think about my grandma. it is my first christmas without her and the first in 14 years where she wont be sitting around the tree after i come to wake her up. i miss her so much it hurts. this picture was taken on my birthday at holmes regional hospital where we ate birthday cake so my godmother (aka grandma) could celebrate with us despite her recent diagnosis with liver cancer.

Blownout

Blownout, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i found out today my dad has been trying to get in touch with me. not only do i not care, but i dont want him to actually figure out how to find me. i have nothing to say to him and i dont want to hear the sob story or have to try and dodge questions about my mom. i am sick of his mind game. i like the fact he doesnt know i have moved, he has never seen my photographs and he has no idea who i am as a person. it makes thinking he is dead all the more believable. this is why i chose a photograph i slightly over-exposed, blowing out the sky on the last vacation i was on. i can remember the feeling of being far away and it's comforting.

interpretive role-play

the fifties story, originally uploaded by starsgonestray.

i shot this photograph while having a sleep over with jason and amber shortly before moving. lately i have been developing my opinions on gender roles and domestic relations. i was inspired by my mother's glass floral arrangement and an ongoing infatuation with incorporating lampshades into my imagery.

Imag(in)e This

I am going to restart my photo-a-day project. I am not sure what the parameters are going to be yet, if I will do solely self-portraits or just whatever I am thinking about, which I guess in a way is also a self-portrait. I dont know, I am not going to define it because I feel I restricted myself too much last year. I may not even take a photo each day but maybe retouch one from the past. I guess just read whatever I post to accompany my image.